Andrei

Congratulations to Andrei, this week's winner of FFF:Spam! What a great story detailing the ins and outs of the "SPAM Business". A job well done!

The only thing that could make humanity insane is no source of internet or videos. But for the time being, the Russians are doing just that. In Moscow, under Red Square, there is a group of people who would be called hackers, or “spammers.” Their real name is The Ghost Virus.  I am just about to enter this elite group of individuals. I have been through specific training, from decoding with Freddy Wong, to playing a game of chess with the President of the United States, and let me tell you, it’s real hard cheating while the men in black are watching your every move. After going through all of this training, I had an opportunity to ask to join the Ghost Virus. One of their top spammers had died due to sever radiation, and being exposed to millions of x-rays and gamma rays. I had just sent the letter in, with my credentials in 2016, and man do they make you wait. It was winter of 2015 and snow had fallen, the mail came, at this point I didn’t expect to get in at all. I just assumed that they thought I was a waste of time, or I wasn’t good enough. It took every last penny I had to travel from Minnesota to Russia, I got there, and it wasn’t a pleasant welcoming. I was hauled away in a black van, bagged, and gagged. I thought this was it; they’d just kill me for no apparent reason. All I remember is going to see the top man, the boss, the one who saw it all. They let me stay, and I’m working to this day. Our facility under Red Square has five divisions. The first divisions is where we do calling and marketing, just like those fake phone calls that you’ll get, you know, the ones that make you give them important info, life their your credit card company  or something. Our second division is for our programmers, where everything we do in here helps the rest of Ghost Virus. The third division is for all the hackers, they will go into everything personal, and take what they can, and give nothing back. Now for our forth division, where I work, the spammers; it is the most income generating division we have. I make sure people get sick or seeing the same things over and over again. We also make the programs to stop the pop-ups, back in division two. And the fifth is restricted, but we all know that there is a giant calendar with a giant clock. It’s counting down the time till we can rule the world with charging people to use any electronics. Oh look, the time has reached 00:00, if you wish to continue to type, it will cost you $1 A MIN, otherwise you will be terminated. Thanks, and have a great day.